You really coming over, don't trick.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
sex in a hospital.. check
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
