dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I need to calm my uterus...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
