apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
