hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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