She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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