i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
