It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
