happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
