Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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