their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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