im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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