the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
