R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
