I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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