my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize