Where did you get a picture of my penis
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize