We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
