and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I think I just shit out all my problems.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
