You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
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