didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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