I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
