Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Terrible idea I love it
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
