all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We are all done wearing pants today
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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