quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize