my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize