; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
