Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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