Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
