please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
