I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Randomize
