Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize