so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
