Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
