I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Randomize
