im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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