the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
