i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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