ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
