What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
