someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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