Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
