the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
