He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
We are all done wearing pants today
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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