Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
