I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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