FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
