I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
