Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
