I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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