i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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