where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
